✦ The Modern Heiress

They don’t boo nobodies, darling, if they talk, it means you matter.

There’s an old truth worth remembering: you’ll never be criticised by someone doing more than you, only by those doing less. The people who are building, risking, and creating rarely have the time or energy to tear others down. Instead, they understand the cost of effort and the weight of courage. It’s usually the bystanders, not the builders, who hand out the harshest judgments. What’s more, social media amplifies voices that may never have stepped into the arena themselves.

So let me break this down for you: the key to navigating criticism is to separate noise from wisdom. Look at the women who’ve walked this path before us, Greta Thunberg, who faced ridicule for demanding accountability on climate change. Ain Husniza, the Malaysian activist who challenged systemic issues in schools despite threats and public backlash and Miley Cyrus, who transformed from Disney star to pop rebel, weathering waves of public criticism yet reclaiming her narrative on her own terms.

Each of them faced storms of judgment, not because they were wrong, but because they dared to be loud, visible, and unapologetic in spaces that preferred them silent.

Greta Thunberg: our modern day female empowerment icon

Take Greta Thunberg. As a teenager, she stood before the world’s leaders and demanded accountability for the climate crisis. Her courage made her one of the most visible young activists of our time. But visibility came with a cost. Politicians, public figures, and countless online critics tore into her, not always with reasoned debate, but with ridicule and dismissal.

Why? Because she was doing what they would not. Greta had the audacity to act, to put her voice into the world when many preferred silence. Her critics often weren’t fellow activists or leaders offering constructive counterpoints. They were people unsettled by her conviction, because it highlighted their own inaction. Greta became a cultural mirror, forcing people to confront the gap between what they said they cared about and what they actually did.

Her example reminds us: when you dare to do more, to risk being seen, you inevitably stir resentment in those doing less. The criticism is less about you and more about the discomfort your courage creates in others.

Ain Husniza: Malaysia’s fearless youth activist

Ain Husniza made waves by speaking out against sexual harassment in Malaysian schools, challenging systemic problems that many preferred to ignore. Her activism began as a brave personal stand, but it quickly drew public attention and backlash. Critics attempted to silence her with threats and ridicule, but Ain refused to retreat.

Her courage lies not only in confronting injustice but in standing visibly and vocally when the world wanted her quiet. The criticism she faced wasn’t a reflection of her failure; it was the discomfort of those benefiting from the status quo. Her visibility forced others to acknowledge what they had long ignored.

Ain’s story teaches young women everywhere that being seen, being loud, and being principled will always attract judgment but that same judgment is proof that their actions matter. True impact is never silent, and Ain’s unwavering stance is a masterclass in turning criticism into fuel for change.

Miley Cyrus: Rewriting her narrative in the spotlight

Miley Cyrus grew up in the public eye, transitioning from Disney darling to a bold pop icon whose every move was scrutinized. From her music to her fashion choices, the media and public were quick to judge, label, and criticize her, often more for daring to be herself than for any actual misstep.

What sets Miley apart is her refusal to let the noise define her. She reclaimed her narrative repeatedly, using criticism as a springboard to explore her identity, creativity, and voice. Each controversial choice wasn’t just rebellion; it was a declaration of autonomy in spaces that preferred conformity.

Her journey reminds young women that visibility comes with scrutiny, and the louder you shine, the more they talk. Criticism is inevitable, but like Miley, you can turn it into a tool for self-expression, reinvention, and empowerment, proving that being authentic is always worth the backlash.

Practical Lessons: How to Handle Criticism

So how do we live this truth day to day? Here are a few reminders:

Criticism is only as powerful as its source. Builders build, bystanders gossip. If they’re talking about you, it’s proof you’re visible, and visibility means you’re already ahead. Never shrink to make others comfortable; your shine was never meant to be subtle.

Every insult is fuel, every envy a free spark. And when you anchor yourself in the voices of women who rewrote history, you stop playing defense and start playing legacy.

my bedtime reads: The Sister (Sung-Yoon Lee), Invisible Women (Caroline Criado Perez) and Why Men Love Bitches (Sherry Argov)

Books like The Sister by Sung-Yoon Lee, Invisible Women by Caroline Criado Perez, and Why Women Love Bitches by Sherry Argov aren’t just bedtime reads, they’re blueprints for power, strategy, and unapologetic womanhood.

I dove into The Sister not for the satire, darling, but to study female leadership on a global stage, to see how women maneuver influence, command attention, and survive in worlds built to dismiss them. Every character, every sharp-witted jab, became a reflection, a lesson in how women can wield intellect, strategy, and presence to change the rules of the game. 

Why Women Love Bitches isn’t about cruelty; it’s a manifesto in disguise. From the moment you see the title, you know the author isn’t telling you to be mean, she’s telling you to own yourself, to set boundaries, to be confident, self-assured, and in control of your narrative. That subtle audacity, that willingness to define your own worth, is magnetic, infuriating to some, and essential to survival.

Then there’s Invisible Women, which hits differently. It’s data, research, reality, the evidence that the world is built without women in mind, and the stories of those left invisible scream between the lines. Reading it, I learned not just to notice gaps, but to craft arguments, articles, and perspectives that center women’s experiences, that demand attention and respect. It’s research turned weapon, knowledge turned strategy, proof that preparation is part of power. Combining these three reads, I realized empowerment isn’t something you stumble into, it’s something you construct, consciously, deliberately, unapologetically.

So yes, darling, read them. Absorb them. Let them reshape how you see the world and how the world sees you. Let the lessons echo in how you carry yourself, how you write, how you fight for space, recognition, and respect. When petty criticism lands, it won’t pierce you because you’ve already armed yourself with history, strategy, and audacity. In the end, it’s not just about surviving in a world built to doubt you, it’s about thriving in it, and laughing while the sidelines chatter.

my side of story

At first, their voices rattled me. When you’re starting out, you want validation, not resistance. I remember second-guessing myself after a particularly harsh comment from someone who, in hindsight, had never put themselves in a position to be criticized at all. But with time and with more risks taken I began to see the pattern clearly: the more I grew, the louder they became. Every new step forward seemed to echo back louder in the form of criticism from those watching, not participating.

And here’s the hard truth I learned: their criticism was never really about me. It was about the discomfort of watching someone else do what they hadn’t dared to try. My ambition reminded them of their inaction. My risks made their comfort zones feel smaller. My visibility made their invisibility harder to ignore. In that sense, their words were less about my flaws and more about their own reflections.

The moment I understood this, criticism lost its sting. It stopped feeling like a wound and began to feel like a compass. If my choices drew hostility from those unwilling to take risks themselves, it meant I was stepping into spaces that scared people. And that’s not failure, that’s impact.

Now, instead of shrinking under criticism, I let it fuel me. I ask myself: is this critique coming from someone building, or from someone spectating? If it’s from a builder, I listen. If it’s from a spectator, I smile and keep walking. Because in the end, criticism from those doing less than you isn’t proof of your failure. It’s proof you’re living a life bold enough to be seen.

Like Greta Thunberg, or any trailblazer who stepped into the spotlight, you will face resistance. But the choice is yours: will you let the noise define you, or will you let it prove that you’re living boldly enough to matter?

In the end, criticism isn’t a stop sign, it’s a signal that you’re on the right path.

—
Your unapologetic self-assured queen,
Madam Alias Solis
Writer, The Modern Heiress