✦ The Modern Heiress

Some friendships don’t end, they just outgrow the version of you that allowed everything.

“Sometimes you have to go broke, lose the person you thought you loved, and watch your friends turn into foes in order to get where you are going. Trust the process. Elevation requires separation.”

These words aren’t just a mantra. They’re a map, a painful one. They speak to the part of us that had to crawl out of emotional ruins, blinking through tears and grit, realizing that everything falling apart was, in fact, falling into place.

No one tells you that the journey into your true self is paved with heartbreak. You’re expected to smile through the loss of friendships that once felt like forever, the breakdown of love you swore would lead to marriage, or the financial crash that humbled your ambition. But behind every “failure” was a quiet reshaping, an invisible force chiseling away what you thought you needed so that you could uncover what you were always meant to become.

To go broke isn’t just about money. It’s about watching every false sense of security shatter. To lose love is to confront every version of yourself that begged to be chosen. To see friends turn into foes is to witness the truth of loyalty when you no longer shrink to stay likeable. It hurts, deeply. But it clears the stage.

And I’ve had many friends. I was the one who gave, who offered parts of myself without limit. But I wasn’t a keeper. I didn’t know how to hold a safe space for myself while keeping the door open for others. I overextended, overcompensated, thinking that kindness alone would protect me. Some took advantage. Some were sweet, until they weren’t. I realized the hard way: being 100% nice doesn’t earn you love. It often invites betrayal. It gives people silent permission to walk over your softness and justify it as closeness. Even the kind ones will test the line when they know you won’t fight back.

Elevation requires separation. Sometimes God, the universe, or life herself has to isolate you in order to align you. You can’t carry old baggage into a new chapter. You’re not being punished; you’re being prepared. You are not being rejected; you’re being redirected. And once you embrace this, every closed door becomes a divine shield.

Trusting the process is one of the bravest acts a woman can commit to. Especially when that process strips her of everything except her essence. It’s lonely. But it’s holy. In the silence, in the stillness, in the solitude, you rise. You become the woman no one saw coming. Not because you forced it, but because you finally stopped chasing what was never yours to begin with.

So keep going. Let the tears fall. Let the silence stretch. Let them go. You are not losing. You are levelling up. What feels like a breakdown is really a rebirth.

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Your unbothered bestie,
Madam Alias Solis
Writer, The Modern Heiress